Partner+Writing+2014-2015

In the following stories, the students worked with a partner to create a story about a snowman using all of the comma rules.






































** *In the following stories, the students worked with a partner to write a story that related to a specific picture. Enjoy! **



Dog+Fish=Dogfish Catherine and Leyton 9/2/14 I can’t breathe. I’m paddling, and I can’t stop, but I don’t know why. I’m also wearing what I heard my owner once call a scuba mask. I know that it’s supposed to help me breathe, but I don’t know how to use it. My nose hurts when I try to breathe, and my lungs are on fire from lack of air. I’m running out of air. As a last resort, I attach the hose that dangles off of my mask to the tank on my back. Finally! I can breathe.

I swim around and realize I’m underwater. It's wet and very, very blue. I can just make out the shape of a fish. Aren’t they edible? I start chasing it around trying to catch it. When I finally catch it, it feels slimy and gross and raw. I let it go, none the worse for wear. Since I am here, I might as well explore. I don’t know where I am, but I’m going to find out.

I have been swimming for quite some time, but I still haven’t found out where I am. Wait! I can see something in the distance. It is something with many moving parts. Since I don't know what it is, should I swim towards it? Is it alive? Will it eat me? Oh, who cares? It could be shelter, food, or my owner, Miss Elliot!

I speed up. If it’s Miss Elliot, I can't wait to see her! She used to paint my nails pink and purple and feed me treats, and she called me //Precious!// She even let me mark my territory on her rug by chewing it to shreds!

Slowly I am able to make out what the object is. It isn’t Miss Elliot, but it looks amazing! The object is orange, red and pink, and it has many holes. Small tropical fish are swimming around it. I snap at a fish. It hides. I snap at another. It hides, too. My tail is wagging so hard, I’m afraid that it will fall off, but I don’t care. I continue to snap and chase the fish. I am about to catch a pink and orange striped one when I wake up from my dream, and I realize that I can’t breathe.

Sammy the Scuba Dog Sara and Colton 8/29/14

One hot summer day, Sammy the dog was playing with his owner, Joe. Sammy was a well-treated rescue dog. Joe decided to take him out of the pound and take him home to live. They were playing fetch together, which was Sammy’s favorite game. They played it for hours, but in one throw of the ball, it went all the way to the scuba shop. Sammy bought some beautiful golden scuba gear. The scuba gear was for his owner, but he decided to try it on. Just as he was trying it on, the store owner threw the tennis ball. Sammy felt the urge to go after that tennis ball, so he did. The ball went into the water, and so did Sammy because that was his instinct. All of a sudden, Sammy was glad that he was wearing scuba gear, so he could swim better. He saw the tennis ball went very deep into the mysterious fathoms. Sammy the dog was persistent and started swimming down. Sammy was so close to the tennis ball.

Oh, no! There were sharks all around him. They were attracted to him because of his golden scuba gear. He was frightened and didn't know what to do, so he started to swim. Then his swim flippers fell off and punched the shark in the eye. Now that problem was over. Sammy went on to what was really important. . . the tennis ball. Sammy finally reached the bottom and spotted it in a shipwreck, so he swam over there, but something else caught his attention. . . a gold and brown oak treasure chest. He searched all over the ship looking for the key. Finally, he found the key in an old hollowed out book. The key was old and rusted. It had a paw print engraved on it. He took the key and took it back to the treasure chest. The treasure chest opened up immediately, like it had been waiting to be opened for years.

Sammy looked inside and he saw golden tennis balls, doggy treats, and chew toys. He didn’t know what to do with the treasure, so he did what he always did. He brought it to Joe. Joe said that Sammy should donate it to the pound. Sammy was being selfish and didn’t want to give it all away to them. That night when Sammy fell asleep, he kept remembering the pound. He hated the emptiness of the halls and the screaming dogs. The next morning he decided that he wanted to donate all the treats. The dogs at the pound were so grateful that they gave Sammy the nickname, Sammy the Scuba Dog.



The Precious Green Ball Kennedy and Jaden 8/29/14

In a small red house across from Central Park, a boy named Little Tommy was throwing a green tennis ball in the backyard of his house with his dog, Trigger. Trigger, a Labrador retriever, is Tommy’s best friend. Trigger won’t stop at anything to get his precious tennis ball. Little Tommy accidentally catapulted the tennis ball over the white fence surrounding the house. Trigger jumped the fence like he had springs in his legs. He bolted across the street like a flash of black lightning.

While Trigger was dodging cars in the street, the ball rolled towards a group of young kids. One of the kids picked up the tennis ball and chucked it into the fountain. Trigger jumped into the fountain and snagged the ball. Since the ball was wet, it slid out of his mouth and kept on rolling to the dog park. The tennis ball was swooped up by a dog owner and thrown over the fence around the dog park. While the ball rolled down the street, it collided with a kid’s dropped ice cream scoop. After being covered with sticky ice cream, the ball rolled onto a soccer field and was kicked to the Mets baseball game. The tennis ball was pitched by the pitcher and was slugged out of the park.

When Trigger finally arrived at the ball game, the tennis ball was in the air sailing to the tennis courts. The ball flew onto a tennis court where a man put the ball into the tennis ball shooter. Accidentally, the man put the machine on full power. The ball was launched out of the tennis ball shooter. It bee-lined toward Little Tommy’s backyard. Trigger saw where the ball was going and took a shortcut to his house. As soon as he was in the backyard, he caught the tennis ball between his teeth. Trigger let out a muffled, happy bark and continued to play fetch with Little Tommy. The tennis ball machine shot the rest of the tennis balls. Even though there were hundreds of tennis balls in the yard, Trigger still wanted to play with his dirty, sticky, drippy ice cream tennis ball. = = Cookies and the Ice CreamShay and Alina 8/30/14

On a bright sunny day there was a dog named Cookies playing outside with his owner named Johnny. When Johnny was about to toss a ball, Cookies heard the musical sound of an ice cream truck and took off for it. While running off, Johnny shouted, “Come back, Cookies!” Cookies didn't listen and continued to search for the ice cream truck.

Cookies arrived at the park panting heavily. When he scaned the crowd, he found the ice cream truck and ran over to it. While the people outside were socializing, he snuck in the back window. Then he jumped onto the cookies and cream freezer. Cookies started grabbing for his favorite ice cream, Cookies and Cream. The owner of the ice cream truck saw the dog with the ice cream in his mouth and locked him in the freezer. The ice cream truck owner called animal control. Animal control arrived at the park ten minutes later. The heavy-set animal control officer named Bob slowly waddled out of his car. Bob, the three hundred pound officer, walked over to the ice cream truck with a dog cage. He grabbed Cookies and put him in the dark cage. Bob was rewarded thirty two liters of ice cream from the owner of the truck for capturing the dog. Bob went back to his car and sped out of the park. Crash!

When Bobby crashed, he fell out of his car onto the asphalt where he discovered that he had hit an eighteen wheeler. Then he quickly fell unconscious. The cage door became loose. Cookies jumped out onto the road. He saw Johnny nailing a poster with a picture of Cookies onto a lamp post. Cookies immediately started barking and ran off to Johnny. Johnny noticed Cookies and ran for him, too. Then the two left the area and headed back home.

Bobby stood up brushing himself off. He saw the poster with Cookies on it. Then he realized it was the exact same dog he had captured that day.

Johnny and Cookies were back home playing catch again, but this time Cookies didn't run off. From that day on Johnny and Cookies lived happily ever after.

= = Ice Cream Eating DogBrooks and Akhil 8/29/14

One hot summer day, there was a dog named Blitz with a best friend named Samuel. Samuel was walking his dog down the block. It was hot outside, so Samuel stopped for ice cream at //Billy’s Ice Cream Shack//. When he arrived, it was closed. Samuel stood there in shock. The police were there and told him what had happened. The store was closed until further notice. Samuel was depressed but not as much as Blitz was. Ice cream was Blitz’s favorite snack. Samuel started to walk home with his dog, but Blitz was too strong. Blitz pulled the leash so hard that the leash slipped out of Samuel’s hands. Blitz ran into the ice cream store. Samuel ran in to get his dog. Blitz was covered in ice cream, and so was Samuel. Finally, Samuel said, “Let’s go home and get you cleaned up.”

On the walk home Blitz was sticky and attracting bugs. Samuel decided to stop at a car wash to clean off his dog. When they arrived at the car wash, Samuel had the hose ready. What he didn’t know was that the hose was turned the wrong way, and he accidentally sprayed himself. He finally turned the hose the right way and washed off his dog. On the way home, Samuel and Blitz were soaking wet, but at last they head home.

As Samuel walked to his front door, he realized his keys had been washed away in the car wash. He decided to go a window and crawl through. Samuel picked up Blitz and carried him through the window. All of a sudden he heard an alarm, and then he realized the house alarm system went off. Since Samuel didn’t know how to turn the alarm off, the police came. Once the police came, they realized it was Samuel’s house, and that everything was ok. The police finally left and Samuel said, “Finally! We’re home!” Samuel looked up and said, “But we never got our ice cream.”

Double OreoKomal, Sreya, Naina 8/30/14

 On a dark, humid night in New York. The Carnelia family was out for dinner at Olive Garden. After the lovely dinner, they went out for dessert at Bruster’s with their dog, Oreo, a black lab. The family of four stood in line ordering their ice cream while Oreo was tied to a bright red chair. Another young family with a small child wanted Oreo ice cream, but the employee said that they had run out. The child being stubborn wouldn’t go for anything besides Oreo ice cream and suddenly started crying and yelling, “I want Oreo ice cream!” Then the employee came back and said that they had one last scoop of Oreo ice cream.

A moment later the employee came back and gave the boy ice cream. The boy cheered. While he was cheering, he dropped his scoop of ice cream on the ground. The boy started whining and yelling, “Oreo ice cream!” which caught Oreo’s wandering attention. Oreo jumped to his feet and his collar broke. He ran to the ice cream which was on the dirty ground. He scooped up the ice cream and ran off like the speed of lightning.

 The Carnelia family went running after Oreo. It was hard to find him because he blended in with the night. It was also hard to find him because he couldn't bark with ice cream in his mouth. Soon the police found Oreo on the side of the street and took him with them thinking he was a stray dog. The police took Oreo, put him in a cage, and took him to an animal shelter. The Carnelia family became tired of searching and called the police. The police answered the phone and asked the family for a description of the dog. The Carnelia's gave a description of Oreo, and the police told them they just taken him to the shelter. The Carnelia family took off running to the car and went to the shelter. They found Oreo and felt relieved. From then on they always kept an eye on the naughty dog.



The Wall, the Field, and the Ball Vincent and Justin 9/1/14

One overcast day in spring in a small town in Oregon, three children and one dog played happily in a large field behind their grandma’s house. Grandma’s house was a tiny, beige house on the outskirts of the small town. Sara and Peter’s three-year-old brother, Teddy, was digging in the dirt looking for stones. Sara and Peter were playing fetch with Jax, their playful and large dog. Jax was a yellow lab that loved to chase tennis balls, but the tennis ball bounced over the wall into the dark, scary forest.

As soon as he heard the loud thump, Teddy’s curiosity got the best of him, so he dashed and glanced over the wall. Teddy asked his brother Peter to help. Peter could have easily climbed the wall himself, but he just pushed aside some vines and revealed a hole that led to the dark forest. The hole was just small enough for Teddy to fit inside. Teddy immediately crawled through the wall, and Jax crawled through as well. The pair saw the tennis ball, so Teddy picked it up but dropped it and ran when he heard a loud hissing noise just a few feet away.

Teddy was a curious boy, but right now he was so scared that he ran past Peter and didn’t even tell him that there was a hissing noise. As soon as Peter noticed that Teddy was scared, he asked him what the matter was. He said that there was a loud hissing noise that was getting closer. Peter said that it must be a snake. Sara started to scream when she noticed that the snake had slithered through the hole in the wall and was now chasing her. Teddy ran back through the hole and retrieved the ball before Jax could. Then, all four of them ran out of the gate on the far side of the field and into grandma’s house. They gave Jax the ball and happily sat down to one of grandma’s pies.

The Puppy BowlLekha and Richard 8/31/14

Zane had been looking over the brick wall for hours. His faithful dog, Zeus, sat next to him keeping him company. Zeus was an Akbash dog with thick, white fur. He had friendly brown eyes and was slightly taller than Zane. Zane had adopted Zeus when Zeus was a wee puppy, so he had been with Zane for quite a long time. Zeus had been Zane’s only friend for as long as he could remember. Zane was on his tiptoes peering closely at the Puppy Bowl taking place on the other side of the wall.

As Zane was looking over the wall, memories of training Zeus for the Puppy Bowl flooded him. Whenever he implored his parents to enter Zeus in the Puppy Bowl, he was turned down. “Maybe when you’re older,” his parents would say, and then they would let the subject drop. It was true. Zane was only five, but Zane felt that he was old enough. Suddenly he felt Zeus’s warm, moist tongue lick on his face, and he was brought back to reality.

Zane sat back against the wall and stroked Zeus’s matted fur. He thought of a plan to enter Zeus in the Puppy Bowl with or without his parent’s consent. His plan of secretly entering Zeus in the Puppy Bowl did work eventually. That is five years later. When the winners of the puppy bowl were announced, ten-year-old Zane swelled with pride to hear that Zeus had won first place. When Zeus claimed victory, Zane felt that all of his tireless endeavors in training Zeus had paid off. Zeus triumphing at the Puppy Bowl had been the proudest moment of his life.